I have cynicism running through my veins like a pessimistic parasite on a mission.

But even I have to admit that sometimes, things so incredible happen that you are forced to stupidly smirk at them no matter what your disposition in life may be.

Such is the case when it comes to the matter of the marriage proposal of one John Zekind to his girlfriend Kara Richter.

John actually contacted Jellyvision Games and asked them if they would help him program the proposal in their game. Since these were the guys that worked on “You Don’t Know Jack” for Facebook, they were of course awesome, and complied. After a short questionnaire to help them determine the best way to handle the proposal, Jellyvision gave John access to his special proposal for Kara to log onto and play. After a few of the usual questions, she got hit with the big question. Natually, she clicked yes, and turned to find her ring bearing fiance.

Of course, as a huge “You Don’t Know Jack” fan, and noted cynic, I kind of want to hear the response to one of the no questions the team no doubt had prepared.

In what is simply a video game news story too bizarre not to report (in other words, sorry mom), French sex toy store Absoloo has a very special promotion going on for any ladies (in France, at least) who lost their boyfriends’ attention due to spending more time with “Diablo III” than them.

This is how it works: You simply post a photo of yourself on the company’s Facebook page holding a copy of “Diablo III,” and they send you a private message with a code that lets you get a free… let’s say it’s a special vibrating magic staff, from their website.

Here is Absoloo’s own (poorly translated) take on the offer:

Ladies and

Your man has not left his computer since the release yesterday of Diablo III?

Still a long time before you find yourself in his arms during a romantic evening …

You yearn … You feel abandoned … Abandoned …

The situation is so, you must admit, your man would rather go in search of magical jewels, gloves sorcerers, and other heavy war clubs to get XP points rather than engaging in the research of your G-spot and gain sexual experience.

So what to do?

Do not despair over! We decided to help you!

Find the force and the attention you need naturally, but with a new friend …

Some people are crying foul that this promotion is sexist against women that play “Diablo III” as the implication is that only men would play the game. To this I say, complaining about it just blinds female gamers from a free toy with purchase of video game promotion that puts all happy meal pack-ins to great blushing shame.

Personally, I think that all available gamers should take the company up on their offer and then send every one of the toys over to Blizzard so that they can go #*%! themselves for all the botches in “Diablo III’s” launch.

The long wait is finally over. Facebook Tristana is now available for free to anyone willing to become a fan of League of Legends on Facebook. It’s a completely painless process for what is actually a pretty cool skin.

Here’s the official post from the Riot forums:

It is my privilege to announce to all of you that, as of today, not being a fan of League of Legends on Facebook will constitute a tactical error! And do you know why that is? Because if you’re not a fan on Facebook, you’re going to be stricken with envy when you see all of your friends playing with their brand new Riot Girl Tristana skin!

That’s right, Runeterrans! You’ve waited patiently, and now your long wait is over! And all you need to do to get your very own gun slinging, rapid firing, rocket jumping yordle lady all punked out with a pink dye job is follow this link! Click here to become a League of Legends Fan and claim your very own Tristana Champion and Riot Girl Tristana skin!

That’s really all you have to do. And yeah, the skin rocks.

Microsoft’s latest update for Xbox Live added Facebok and Twitter integration to the service, a feature that is reportedly reaching millions of Xbox Live subscribers. Microsoft’s official usage stats for the first week show that two million users logged in to Facebook accounts, with another half million creating new accounts. The first statistic isn’t so surprising – two million users is roughly ten percent of all Xbox Live subscribers – but I found the second pretty shocking.

The two million users stat is sort of pointless because just about anyone forced to download the update will give it a shot once. And why not log in so that you don’t have to later on? To me, though, the service is too stripped down to use often, and Facebook pictures are rarely the sorts of things that need to be viewed on a TV screen, but that’s just me.

Microsoft didn’t give any data regarding Twitter adoption, other than to say that the service has received tweets from almost every region where Xbox Live is present. Color me unimpressed.

Source: CNet

The Playstation 3 blog has officially announced Facebook integration with the firmware 3.10 update. By downloading the update you’ll be able to link your PSN account to your Facebook account, including updates for Trophy and Playstation Store activity. The update also gives developers the ability to include Facebook updates for certain achievements made in-game.

There’s no date associated with the announcement other than “soon,” which is funny considering the Xbox Live update adding Facebook integration comes out, oh, tomorrow. The rest of the update is just a bunch of UI tweaks, mostly to undo some of the fugly color changes that came with 3.00. There’s also a nice photo update that allows you to see more photos. Easier media browsing is pretty much always a good thing.

Almost forgot, the live feed updates for in-game accomplishments can be patched in for already released games.