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Much Like the Kinect, Microsoft’s Latest Decision to Take the Control of Games out of the Gamer’s Hands, Will be a Failure

 

I may never get a chance to do so elsewhere, so let me pay tribute to one of my favorite critics, the late, great Roger Ebert, by paraphrasing his famous review of the film “North” to convey my feelings on the news that the next Xbox will likely require you to always be online.

I hate that idea. Hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it. Hate it. I hate every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting implication of it. It hate the sensibility that thinks anyone will like it. I hate the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it.

While still not the official Microsoft statement, the recent, and soon to be infamous, tweets of Microsoft creative director Adam Orth on the subject seem to imply that if Microsoft isn’t already committed to the idea of making a console that requires an internet connection, they’ve certainly considered it.

Specifically he summed up the notion of a console that requires an internet connection with three simple words.

“Deal with it.”

Used as a rebuttal to every befuddled complaint thrown his way, Adam Orth would like it very much if we never dare question the motivations or intentions of Microsoft again. Because of these outlandish and insulting comments, Microsoft is now the ones who have to “deal with it,” as they scramble to make sure everyone knows that the views of Adam Orth “Do not reflect the customer centric views we take to our products.”

If you haven’t done so already, please take a moment to laugh at that statement. You can either laugh at the implication that the creative director of Microsoft’s views somehow do not reflect the company he works for, or have a chuckle at the fact that the problem isn’t his viewpoints necessarily, but rather that he couldn’t say them in a more PR friendly manner.

Whatever you do though, don’t take this situation seriously. I do not mean to expect these rumors to turn out to be false (they most likely aren’t), but rather do not join the legions who will suddenly give credence to the notion of an online required console as a possible evolution of the medium, or attempt to play the devil’s advocate on the subject by attempting to analyze the notion as an inevitability.

For supporting this idea, Microsoft  is simply wrong. They were wrong when they released consoles that died more frequently than a light bulb, and they are wrong again in creating a new system that once again suggests that purchasing a console and owning a game does not guarantee your ability to use either.

There is no logical argument that exists to support a DRM system in the current state the technology exists in, for anyone not on the corporate take. While there are an abundance of logical arguments against the system, none should be used to entertain this particular notion. Instead, if you are opposed to this idea, please just laugh uncontrollably at it anytime a Microsoft representative brings up the idea publically, in order to pay the same respect to them, that they do to you by supporting DRM.

If the next generation Xbox is online only, it should also come with a statement that all owners must sign, have notarized, and officially submit to a court of law. That statement will read:

“We hereby wave our right to ever complain through any available medium regarding any technical issues that may arise preventing us from using our systems. We have weighed our options to choose rationality and common sense against blind allegiance, and have chosen to deal with it.”

An Entirely New Way to Enjoy “Bioshock Infinite”

Can’t get enough “Bioshock Infinite?” It’s hard to blame you really, as along with being one of the most stylistically complex and intellectually rewarding games of all time, it’s also somewhat short.

Though the game’s developers are promising a bountiful amount of DLC add-ons for the title, if you really need your “Infinite” fix in the meantime, you may want to consider the somewhat intriguing upcoming board game version.

In production by board game creator PlaidHat Games, “Bioshock Infinite: The Siege of Columbia” will share the rough timeline of the video game, as players choose between warring factions and vie for control of the floating city of Columbia, all while rouge elements Booker and Elizabeth carry out their own adventure, and possibly disrupt or aid yours.

Details concerning the game’s rules are still coming, but it’s meant for 2-4 players, contains 52 impressively detailed miniatures, and sounds like a mix of “Risk,” “Monopoly,” and, thanks to the skyhook system of rails, even “Chutes and Ladders” (yeah I haven’t played a board game in a while…). On an aesthetic level, everything from the board and pieces, to the cards and papers are incredibly well designed and capture the creative spirit of the source material perfectly. Also given the amount of pieces shown so far, and the company’s usual style, it’s likely this will be a pretty in-depth and complex board game that should provide the same level of outside the box thinking fans have come to expect from this series.

While a board game version of a video game may seem like a step back technologically, this is actually a smart complement to “Infinite.” The revolution was one of the game’s biggest themes and plot points, and getting to explore it further (along with everything else about the world of “Infinite”) through an active means like a board game is an enticing proposition. Also considering it is so hard to incorporate multiplayer into the “Bioshock” video game world without it coming across as cheap (see “Bioshock 2”), this may be the perfect alternative.

Available at a pre-order discount price of $59.95, there is no firm release date for the set as of yet, but given the level of care that has seemingly been put into it, this looks to be the furthest thing from a cash-in attempt, and may be worth any serious “Bioshock” fan’s attention.

Metal Gear Solid Returns, but David Hayter Will Not

In an age of 24 hour news coverage, it’s nearly impossible to pull a surprise game announcement off anymore, as leaks happen everywhere and many people have become jaded to the point of trying to actively guess surprises, lest they be accused of being caught off guard.

So when Hideo Kojima revealed that the mysterious upcoming release “The Phantom Pain” is in fact “Metal Gear Solid 5,” he pulled of one of the few genuinely surprising game announcements of recent memory, even though there will be a vocal contingent that suggests otherwise.

The real shock though would come later as famed video game voice actor David Hayter (who’s been the voice of Solid Snake since “Metal Gear Solid” for the Playstation) revealed he would not be reprising his famed role for the new title.

While seemingly of good spirits about the decision, when questioned if he was even asked to do the role, Hayter responded simply “nope.”

Now there are some possibilities of why this is. Without trying to break down the entire convoluted “Metal Gear” story to this point, there is a possibility that the Snake in this game does not chronologically sync with the Solid Snake Hayter famously portrayed (he could be younger). The only thing is, another character that is almost definitely in the game, Hayter also voiced in the series around the appropriate chronological time, adding some more “Huh?” to the confounding announcement.

Also the, possibly temporary, new Snake actor sounds kind of like a young gravely Christian Bale “Batman”, as opposed to the undisputed bad ass you get from Hayter.

Admittedly I was upset when I first heard this news. Traditionally video game voice actors do not upstage the characters they play, but Hayter became one of the few exceptions. His work is instantly iconic, and completely inseparable from the character to the point of becoming a large factor in many gamers preferring the English audio of the series to the original Japanese, which is a rare occurrence.

Ideally, animation (or computer programming) would give you the advantage of maintaining an iconic actor and not having to worry about the years ruining the physical attributes of the character they play. For instance James Bond needs new actors, while Homer Simpson does not.

Then again this may all be another Kojima ruse to rile the fanbase (if so, mission accomplished). Somehow though, it doesn’t feel like that, and instead sounds like a true goodbye to one of video gaming’s most important voices. Hayter’s work helped not only build one of gaming’s biggest franchises, but also helped show that cinematic video gaming was not only possible, it could excel.

March Madness apps

The NCAA tournament is living up to its billing again as one of the premiere sporting events out there, and like other premium events like the Super Bowl or The Masters, it actually drives quite a bit of app development as companies try to cash in on the popularity of this sport.

That’s always been true with broadcasters, blogs and fantasy sports games, along with tons of web-based bracket games, but now many app makers are joining in on the fun, and the ability to enjoy these games is being enhanced as a result.

This list covers some of the cool apps related to March Madness. There are tons of apps with the bracket feature that let’s you pick your games, but there are many other cool apps as well for basketball fans. Naturally, the NCAA has created an app where you can watch all the games live. For junkies who want to see every last-second win live, like Aaron Craft’s game-winning three for Ohio State, then this is the must-have app for the tournament. An app like this is great if your girlfriend is dragging you somewhere during the games. Some guys will just say no and head off to a sports bar, and there’s an app for that as well if you’re looking for the best place to watch the game. But some guys have girlfriends dreaming of an engagement and surfing for rings on sites like Primestyle.com. The guy may not be in a hurry to go along, but he doesn’t want to lose her either. So in that case, insisting on a sports bar over the place she wants to go can be a real problem, so that’s where the live apps are ideal.

I’m still looking for some games that go beyond just picking winners. Long ago we played a fantasy game at work where you could pick players in the tournament. You had to pick based on how much they would scores per game, but also on how long they might be in the tournament. It was a great game but I haven’t seen anything like it. Now that would be a cool app!

“Bioshock Infinite”…and 8 Other Games Well Worth the Wait

I hereby denounce any public or private doubts I had about “Bioshock Infinite.”

The game really is just that good, as you’ve probably gathered from nearly every review and impression.

It’s hard to not have had doubts at some point about the title though, considering the substantial development time and departures of major developers during which. There is, however, precedent for games surviving that type of ordeal, as an elite group of titles managed to survive long delays, and massive amounts of hype and expectations, to emerge as great games. I can think of 8 in particular that were well worth the wait.

 

Honorable Mention – “Fallout 3” – A definite candidate, but “Fallout 3” gets a lot of love on this site, so just once I wanted to give some other titles their dues.

8. Mother 3

I remember seeing the first blurry and ugly screens of the “EarthBound 64” project in Nintendo Power, and being ecstatic about the prospect to a sequel about my favorite game ever.

As time went on screenshots and other news releases became fewer and fewer, until many started to believe the whole thing may have been an elaborate hoax. Then around 2004-2005, word got out that a third entrant in the cult hit “Mother” series would finally see release…in Japan. Not content with letting the land of the rising sun have all the fun, a dedicated group of American fans released an incredible and thorough translation of the title, so almost everyone could finally play the long awaited sequel.

While admittedly not the best game on this list, the “abandon all hope” mentality was strong regarding this one, and the dedicated translation efforts go to show that you can’t get in the way between fans and the games they really want.

7. LA Noire

Not all long awaited game are continuations or sequels.

The only original property on this list, there were rumblings of a 1940’s noire style video game dating back to 2003 when developer Team Bondi was formed. Originally set to be published exclusively by Sony, as the years wore on the game would switch publishers to Take Two, and seemingly grew in ambition as the release date kept slipping and slipping. Until the game graced the cover of a 2010 Game Informer, many even believed it to be quietly axed.

While reception to “L.A. Noire” was somewhat mixed due to its polarizing gameplay style, there is no denying the technical marvel of the graphics, or the pitch perfect execution of its retro style. The first video game to ever be accepted as an entrant to the Tribeca Film Festival, “L.A. Noire” emerged from an endless development cycle quite possibly something greater than it was originally conceived as.

6. The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

The only reason this one isn’t higher, is because it was somewhat inevitable.

Still it was 1991 when “A Link to the Past” had Nintendo fans the world over gushing over the series’ brilliance, and outside of “Link’s Awakening” for the Game Boy, it would be 1998 before the true follow up to the series would see release. In the middle was a whole lot of nothing, as Nintendo remained mum about their most anticipated theoretical title, only casually referencing it, and often speaking of only delays.

Of course you probably know how this one turned out, as “Ocarina of Time” is widely regarded as one of the best games ever, and shows anticipation is a benefit if you can capitalize off of it.

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