The Greatest (Non-Licensed) Super Hero Games

Until very recently, the world of comic book video games have been an up and down realm of quality, as two mediums that you would think should work harmoniously, end up clashing when it comes to the final product.

The fields become even murkier when talking about comic book video games that aren’t based on existing properties, of which there are astonishingly few. Developers seem to be in no hurry to create super hero style games of their own design, making the sub-genre a near non-existent species. Don’t take that to mean there aren’t standouts in the field though as gamers have, on rare occasion, been granted some truly inspired comic book champions, based on no specific comic at all.

So true believers and gamers everywhere, here are the five best non-licensed super hero video games.

Comix Zone

Ok, so the hero of “Comix Zone” isn’t your traditional super hero, but I could never forgive myself if I didn’t take his opportunity to talk about this Sega Genesis gem.

“Comix Zone” puts you into the role of comic artist Sketch Turner as he jumps into one of his own creations, and attempts to save the day, side scrolling game style. “Comix Zone” had a lot of fun with the concept, as stages are broken into comic panels that you actively traverse. The first time you see your character jump to the next panel is a thrilling moment in smart gaming design, and the feeling never goes away as the game continuously explores the better uses of the idea, and never stops having fun with it. This is especially evident in moments like the artist intervening to finish a drawing, power ups that let you manipulate the stages for attacks, or the ability to become an unstoppable traditional hero momentarily, and the general straight from the comics graphics.

“Comix Zone” is brutally difficult and cruelly short, but even over the years it has remained noteworthy for all the original reasons, and remains a must play for fans of super hero games.

City of Heroes

In a massively multiplayer online world filled with raging medival fantasy style hordes, darkness and uncertainty reigned, as the people searched for a beacon of originality. A champion of a new day. Along came “City of Heroes”, a liberator from the same old, same old.

Like so many other MMO’s “City of Heroes” was rough around the edges when first released, but still immediately presented an alternative to the more traditional MMO, that was accessible, wildly entertaining, quicker paced, and so damn fun, as you created a super hero to patrol a thriving metropolis with others. The hero creation process maybe the game’s best feature, as it allowed you to truly play a role that was uniquely yours (the whole point of the genre remember) and create a perfect facsimile of your favorite super hero, or something entirely unique. From there you could form super groups, demolish massively underpowered muggers, or just generally live out your super hero fantasies with a level of depth never before granted.

It was a sad, sad day when NCsoft dropped “City of Heroes”, as we will probably never see a game like it again. It still stands tall though as perhaps gaming’s greatest tribute to the golden age of comics.

Freedom Force

Actually if “City of Heroes” isn’t gaming’s greatest comic tribute, it might be “Freedom Force”.

If you’ve never played it, think of it as “Baldur’s Gate” for super heroes. While not quite as grand and near flawless as that series, it does echo that franchise’s level of world depth as everything from character design to histories and motives are so detailed that it’s almost impossible to believe that it wasn’t based on one specific pre-existing long running comic series. It does, however, take cues from just about every single golden age comic, and the love for that source material is so glowing that it will make any comic fan uncontrollably grin while playing it. Comic game’s live and die by their sense of style, an “Freedom Force” thrives from it. Trying to summarize it all would be an insult to the work put into it.

“Freedom Force” took a novel concept and ran with it with such authority that it assured gamers no one could ever take a swing at the idea again, and certainly wouldn’t be able to do it with near the creative level of completeness that “Freedom Force” achieved.

Infamous

A first look at “Infamous” doesn’t make it scream “Super Hero Game”. The first time you play it though, you realize that it is one of gaming’s most original super hero creations.

You find yourself playing as Cole MacGrath, a bike messenger who, due to an accident, suddenly finds himself with the ability to manipulate electricity. Cole’s path from here is unclear as the player guides him on the path to becoming a great super hero or super villain, and watch his powers evolve and shape based on those decisions. It carried on the open world, task based super hero game idea that “Spider-Man 2” made popular, and, due in large part to some fascinating uses for the electrical manipulation powers of Cole, things rarely became stale as you were constantly uncovering new uses for the abilities and, thanks to the creative prowess of developer Sucker Punch (creators of the Sly Cooper series), constantly entertained by a strong plot and the comic book style story interludes that drove it.

“Infamous” was one of the first must have PS3 exclusives and, as proven by the eerily similar “Prototype” released around the same time, is a difficult to execute idea pulled off to near perfection here. It represents gaming’s most original stab at the idea of a modern super hero tale.

Viewtiful Joe

Taking its cues not just from comic books, but cartoons and film as well, “Viewtiful Joe” is an incredible sensory overload.

It was Capcom’s glorious big name return to the 2D action genre, and it paid tribute to just about everything the average gamer grew up loving, including video games itself. However, there is no doubt that “Viewtiful Joe” is a super hero, and his powers of time and distance manipulation are original, and uniquely used in ways like slowing down time to take out helicopters (their blades can spin fast enough). In any other developers hands, the amount of things “Viewtiful Joe” throws at you would become overwhelming, and may eventually lose the intended effect. In the skilled possession of one of the all time great developers in Capcom though, the game is a textbook example of how to properly implement the feeling of handling a super hero in a video game, and of the 2D action genre as well.

Considering it’s all time great pedigree, near flawless execution, and commitment to making every frame and moment an absolute and original blast of creative wonderment, I’m ready to call “Viewtiful Joe” gaming’s greatest original super hero creation.

Henshin-a-go-go, baby!

What does “Earthbound”, the Vice President of the World, and a Homeless Guy Have in Common? That Would be New RPG “Citizens of Earth”

It’s not uncommon for good ideas to not translate into good video games. However, even in instances where creative games bomb spectacularly, they can still lead to very memorable experiences.

Even though we don’t have much to go off of regarding it at this time, it still seems like recently revealed indie RPG project “Citizens of Earth” is guaranteed to at least be a memorable experience as it has not one, but several very interesting ideas forming its basic blueprint.

It comes to us from developer Eden Industries who crafted one of those aforementioned brilliant, but flawed, games with their first title, “Waveform”, and has players taking the role of the Vice President of the World in his quest to rid his small home town of various weirdos and presumed evil doers. Now being a politician, and not wishing to get his hands dirty, the VP takes on a “team leader” approach and recruits denizens of the town to fight his battles for him. The character types range from body builders, to baristas, to homeless guys, and each not only brings unique attributes to combat, but when left out of your party, can provide certain abilities based on their character type with services like discounted items in their shops, town expansions, and exploration rewards.

Few specifics are known about the game, but it is confirmed that it will be much in the style of a classic JRPG, only with no random encounters (enemies will be viewable on the game world) and a combat system that will allow for battle restarts for party member swaps. Other than that, the games creator’s are sooner to talk about the broadstrokes and style of “Citizens of Earth”, and it’s easy to see why, as the game uses concepts from some of the greatest games of all time. It’s party leader influencing combat mechanic is straight from “Pokemon”, the expanded party, and their unique abilities, are reminiscent of the “Suikoden” series, it’s got a hyper Americana sense of character and environment design that reminds me of the artwork from “Fallout”, and best of all the entire game, from the humor, to the enemies, to the  basic design, borrows heavily from my favorite game of all time, “Earthbound”.

No a great idea doesn’t always mean a great game, but when you are taking your cues from games that are both some of the greatest of all time, and in some cases the most criminally underappreciated, and using them to enhance what is already a unique story concept, you come away with something that stands on its own, and looks to be an always welcome breath of fresh air for the medium. In any case fans of classic RPGs, and bold games in general, should set aside time to keep an eye on “Citizens of Earth” as it progresses, and aims to start a Kickstarter campaign later this year.

A Blue Collar Genius, His Twitter Using Daughter, and An Impossible Labyrinth Puzzle

Don’t attempt to adjust your computers folks, this is still a video game site.

But just for today, I don’t want to talk about video games. Instead, I want to share with you an interesting story about…well…just a game.

If it makes you feel any more comfortable, it comes from Japan, like many video games do, but it’s an extremely detailed hand crafted maze that fits on a 35 X 23 inch piece of paper. It’s already being considered perhaps the most complicated maze of its type ever designed, and is not only impossibly detailed, and impossibly beautiful, it may actually be impossible to beat.

That little tidbit comes to us via the Twitter user Kya7y who introduced this maze to the world, along with the fact that, so far as she knows, there is a good chance that the maze cannot be beaten. That’s not just because it is so mind boggling complex, but because a winning scenario may not even exist within its confines. She would  know too, as her father is the inventor of the maze, and he spent 7 long years working on the design, without even being sure if it is possible to finish.

While not much is known about the inventor, we do know that he is not a mathematician, architect, or graphic designer, but rather, in a moment of “Good Will Hunting” imagery, is a janitor at a public university. Who, it’s worth pointing out again, spent 7 whole years designing this maze almost 30 years ago, without the aid of quite a few modern technological conveniences.

Which brings us to an interesting point. There are 50 copies of this maze available at the moment, and a rumored second, alternate maze in existence, and already there is a bit of a craze as people formulate ideas on how to try to solve it. While many theories involve computer scanning the maze and using algorithms and programs to see if it is possible, I say to hell with that. If anyone wants to solve this, they need to do so with the same tools available to the creator. If that means we never know if it is possible, then that only means that this incredible design will forever maintain the mystique it so greatly deserves.

Kind of makes “Contra” seem like a walk in the park huh?

Though to be Fair I Still Haven’t Beaten That One Without Cheating

As Details Emerge About the Next Playstation, I say Goodbye to the DualShock Controller

There has been a recent flood of information leaking the technical aspects of the new Playstation (and Xbox), that suddenly has everyone realizing that the official unveiling of Sony’s new system is indeed imminent. While we’ve learned a lot more about that new Playstation in the last week thanks to those leaks, there is still a great deal of the unknown as gamers eagerly await to see what Sony’s next gen system will bring them.

One thing that is becoming clear though is that the classic DualShock controller will not be part of that unveiling, as several sites, citing internal sources, are now reporting that Sony will be ditching their tried and true DualShock controller design and coming up with a fresh model. While it is unknown if the new Playstation controller will maintain basic elements of that old controller, already there are rumors of new features like a built-in touch LCD screen, and biometric sensors in the controller that would allow for readings of player’s certain physical properties such as sweat and nerves that could affect things like the character’s aim.

Obviously with Nintendo going bonkers with the Wii U remote (and redefining what a controller meant to a system with the Wii) every other company was going to have to step up their designs, and so this announcement is a bittersweet one, due in large part to the DualShock controller being the greatest video game controller of all time.

Even if you ignore the most basic features of the controller like it’s smart layout and curvy features that just naturally felt right in your hands, it’s the dual analog sticks and vibration ability that secures that lofty title for the DualShock. It’s easy to forget that the re-design from the original Playststion was a response to the analog stick on the N64, as it became quickly evident that the traditional four direction D Pad was not going to be enough to properly handle a new generation of 3D gaming. Humorously though, with the original dual analog controller re-design (minus the rumble feature) Sony still included a little button that would turn the analog feature on and off so gamers wouldn’t feel overwhelmed or burdened by the new technology. They in fact wouldn’t make a game that fully required its use until the brilliant “Ape Escape” which made considerable beneficiary use of the new design.

Slowly though, the gainful advantages of the dual stick design became immediately evident as it allowed for an unimpeded 360 degree movement system that was still as precise as any single direction direct input. Just imagine trying to play a modern FPS on a console without the dual stick layout, or a third person action or platform game without the freedom of movement and camera control at the same time. As for the built in rumble feature, you just need to recall “Metal Gear Solid“, and that moment where “Psycho Mantis” moves your controller by activating the rumble at a high capacity. It was an all time classic moment in video games that wouldn’t have been possible without the feature, and is just an example of the new level of interaction that the device was capable of providing.

It all came together to form the perfect gaming controller. When you look back at certain controllers, they’re often too simple, too cluttered, or too specifically remembered for their value in certain titles (the N64 and “Goldeneye” or the original Xbox controller and “Halo” for instance). Games always found a way to smartly use just about every button on the DualShock, and it worked for every style of game, not making itself noteworthy for one title above any other. It’s why Sony felt there was no need to change the design for the Playstation 2 or Playstation 3 (slight modifications and wireless functionality aside), and truthfully if they wanted to, it could still hold up for the next generation some 15 + years after the original design’s retail release.

It’s hard to fault Sony for reconsidering the controller for their next system, but even if they don’t maintain the design of the DualShock, we can only hope they remember the spirit of it, and engineer a controller that doesn’t strive to change gaming, but instead accounts for the natural evolution of the medium and inadvertently does so in the process.

Great Games! (That Didn’t Get Good Until Halfway Through)

When I think back to some of gaming’s greatest beginnings, I think of “Uncharted 2“, “Batman: Arkham City“, and “Bioshock“. They’re great games that let you know from the very start that you are in for an experience like no other.

But not all games have that luxury. In fact, the only way to appreciate games with truly great beginnings, is to play games that struggled to get started. If you’re looking for some suggestions, here are some of the greatest games of all time, that took a while to really get good.

Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast

One of the top 5 Star Wars games, and one of the most underrated games period, “Jedi Outcast” was an absolutely brilliant tale that saw retired Jedi Kyle Katarn (who went through some absolute hell in the earlier game to want to give up being a friggin Jedi), wrapped up in the newest plot to take over the galaxy, and forced to go back into the Jedi life to solve it, while taking a little vengeance along the way. Sound pretty bad ass? Oh yeah, it is.

However, before you even get to use the force young padawan, you must slog through the game’s first few missions using nothing but guns, as the early moments are nothing but a first person shooter set in the Star Wars universe. This is actually a trademark of the series, since the second game, but you see the thing is that at its design worst, “Jedi Outcast” features horrible flip switching puzzles, bad jumping sections, and aimless wandering. The first half of the game exemplifies all of these flaws, and doesn’t even give you a lightsaber or force powers to help ease the pain. It’s not like it’s the worst first person shooter ever, but it’s fairly far from the best and takes some time, and patience, to get through.

But here’s the thing. Without the dullness of that first half, that moment you meet Luke Skywalker, grab your lightsaber, use the force, and hear that beautiful “Star Wars” music swell wouldn’t be near as sweet. Earning the right to that moment is what makes it, and the game in general, so incredible. Even on subsequent playthroughs though, when you know the reward, it is still difficult to force yourself through that first half.

Deus Ex

I hate to admit this, but embarrassingly I never found the words to adequately describe “Deus Ex.” Instead, I’d refer you to the mounds of accolades and awards it accumulated, and confirm with you that it was indeed a revolutionary breath of fresh air that’s influences wouldn’t be properly noticed for years to come, as even leading developers seemingly couldn’t appreciate exactly what it was.

The average gamer may have never gotten the chance to experience that though. “Deus Ex” was a first person game, but it wasn’t really a first person shooter, and trying to play the game like that, as many at the time surely did, only led to a swift demise. That’s because while you can play the game guns blazing, in that first mission you’re forced to take a more stealthy, very careful approach as you worked though what was essentially a tutorial of the game. What hurt is that it lacked many of the character enhancement options and various tactics that made “Deus Ex” so much of what it would be. Your methodical approach towards liberating the terrorist controlled statue of liberty is the game’s lowpoint, and doesn’t lend much encouragement to seeing the rest of the game through.

Even after that lengthy intro, it takes a mission or two for the game, and plot, to find its groove and for the series RPG and strategy elements to kick in properly. Once it all comes together though (which occurs around the time of a major plot twist), its inescapable brilliance is a constant onslaught to your senses. You can retrospectively laugh at gamers that didn’t stick through the beginning of “Deus Ex”, but really the game did itself no favors in immediately making itself welcome.
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Massachusetts is Banning Light Gun Games…But I Can’t Forget Them

Recently, Massachusetts made the decision to ban light gun arcade shooters from its state operated rest stops, due in no small part to the Sandy Hook shootings, and the renewed attention they have brought to violent video games.

It’s a knee jerk, most likely ineffective, but sympathetically understandable move that is sure to inspire all kinds of debate. Not to make light of the move, or the situations surrounding it, but mostly what the initiative got me thinking about was how awesome light gun shooters were. Along with fighting games and side scrolling brawlers, the light gun shooter genre is one that is immediately associated with arcades, and is sure to unleash a torrent of memories when you invoke its name among the proper group

As that’s exactly what happened with me, I couldn’t resist and had to take the opportunity to highlight some of the greatest the genre has to offer.

House of the Dead 2

Believe it or not, there was a time the argument could be made that there weren’t enough zombie games on the market.

Even in that dark age, there was still “House of the Dead”. The zombie invasion light gun shooter was a breath of fresh air with its old school gothic atmosphere and intense horror chokepoints. The worlds of horror and light gun shooting didn’t clash very often, and while that’s a shame, it might just be because this series did it perfectly to begin with. The best entrant was “House of the Dead 2”, as its branching storyline, great boss fights, inspired overall design, and awesomely bad dialogue and story provided an all time classic that was so enjoyable it made a successful port to the Dreamcast, and inspired an unlikely, and incredible, keyboard skills based spin-off in “Typing of the Dead”.

Even in the now overcrowded zombie video game market, “House of the Dead 2” remains one of the best of all time.

Time Crisis 3

A staple of arcades, rest stops, and movie theaters everywhere, the “Time Crisis” series is the rockstar of the arcade light gun shooter market.

While its pedal based cover system was particularly innovative, at its most basic it did everything that every light gun shooter did well, but just better and more intense. “Time Crisis 2” may have been the most important of the series with its two player mode that would split the players along separate paths in a stage, it’s “Time Crisis 3’s” multi weapon system, and best of everything mentality, that gets the nod here.

“Time Crisis” is the poster child of everything great about light gun shooters, and to this day warrants dropping a quarter or two into when you pass one by.

Silent Scope

Konami’s light gun shooter series took an inspired approach to the genre by placing the player into the role of an elite sniper.

Sporting one of the most incredible light gun peripherals ever, players would move around the screen and use the LCD scope of the rifle controller to zoom into an area and eliminate the target. The sensation was exactly that of being an elite sniper, as you oversaw an area with extreme prejudice at your disposal, and the feeling of overwhelming power you enjoyed was only possible thanks to the arcade experience provided chiefly by the functionality of the  rifle controller. Thankfully, it also retained the over the top story and situations of traditional light gun shooters.

The console ports of this one just never worked without the rifle controller, but if you got the chance to try it in its native format, you were lucky indeed.
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“Sly Cooper: Thieves in Time” Just Became a Real Steal

If you ever hear someone drone on longingly about the “Sly Cooper” series, understand that it is because it’s one of “those games”. There wasn’t much hype around the first game, so anyone that played it usually did so under unique circumstances, and were met with a title that was simply charming. It may have been rough around the edges, but the mounds of charm that emitted from the title combined with some great stealth-lite gameplay to produce something that made you want to scream its praises to anyone within earshot

It’s that type of reaction that led to a continuation of the series, that will carry on with the upcoming “Sly Cooper: Thieves In Time”. Until recently, the only good reason you needed to be excited for Sly 4 was Sly 1-3. However, there’s now an even better reason to snatch up the game like a thieving raccoon, considering that it will now only cost $39.99 for the PS3 version and $29.99 for the PS Vita. We also know that the PS3 version will include a downloadable copy of the Vita version as part of Sony’s “Cross-Buy” initiative.

Clearly, that makes this a hell of a deal. In fact, considering that all we hear about is the rising costs of video game production, some are considering this usually joyful announcement of a cheaper AAA video game to be suspicious. The concerns are that this will somehow lead to a very short game, or one that the developers are somehow worried about going over well. This has led to a marketing manager at Sony assuring people that this is not a cover up or ploy, but rather a way to make sure as many people as possible get a chance to play the game.

Of course, even if it is somehow true that this price cut is a preemptive measure for something the developers know that we don’t, this is still a generous move that all PS3 gamers should take note of when Sly 4 is released on February 5th in North America.

Hello Sony? It’s me, Common Sense

Hey there Sony, it’s your old friend common sense. Long time no see right? Well, listen, I know we haven’t talked much since you didn’t invite me to that 2006 E3 conference, and I’d love to reminisce about those times we hung out and you moved to the CD format and revolutionized the industry, or added a DVD player to your system and changed how a game console was viewed as the central home entertainment piece, but the truth is that I came here to talk about something serious.

I heard about your new patent you see. You know, the one that in only a couple of years could theoretically allow you to end the sale of used games by flagging them and preventing the discs from being used on other systems? The one that sent Gamestop’s stock tumbling down 5% at just the idea of it? You know the one right? You do? Oh great man. Great.

It’s just, I thought I should be the one to tell you it’s not a good idea. Take it from me that it just doesn’t make sense. I know you grind your teeth (a practice I also don’t advise) every time you think of the used game market and the money that Gamestop alone takes from it that you essentially don’t see a dime of, just like I know that it makes your blood boil to think of it as anything less than organized piracy. And hey, you don’t need to tell me that if all of those used game profits went back into yours, and the developer’s, pockets, then you could theoretically change the literal fortune of the industry either. Remember, this is your old pal common sense. I get that.

But you can’t honestly believe that you wield a position of unscrupulous power that would allow you to get away with this do you? You do understand that Microsoft and Nintendo (who at least call me for drinks once in a while…just saying) have equal or larger market shares worldwide to boast about , and used the entire last generation for the lone goal of making people forget the name Playstation was once synonymous with video games right? I mean, you know that actually implementing such an idea would only drive gamers to those systems in droves, and as they make the kind of profits you only dreamed about with this act precisely by not implementing it, you could only sit and watch as every loyalist you had jumps ship?

What are you thinking man? Do you believe that you somehow have enough exclusive titles that gamers will still stick with you through this? I got news for you pal, “Uncharted” and “God of War” don’t come out that often. Or maybe you think the massive fan support that the new kid on the block the “Ouya” generated with exactly the opposite kind of philosophy that you are proposing was just a fluke? Or that should Valve release the Steam Box it wouldn’t be the most anticipated console to hit the market in years? Did the Playstation Move, Home, the PSP and Vita, and Wonderbook somehow become amazing successes when I wasn’t paying attention, so you’re not worrying about the repercussions of your actions anymore?

Ok, that was harsh. I apologize.

I Mean, Just Because Someone Else Had It First Doesn’t Mean it Isn’t a Good Idea Right?

But really my point is this. You’ve changed Sony. You used to be cool. You brought people a system in the Playstation that for the first time got the kids who used to beat up other kids for playing video games, playing the same video games. You changed the world overnight by supporting “Final Fantasy VII”, and shaped a new generation of controller design with the Dualshock. You’ve given countless runaway and unwanted developers and properties homes and turned them into favorite sons. Hell, you invented the Playstation 2!

Yet look at you now. Drawing up papers that would screw over the little guy the world over so you can maintain your finger grip grasp on video game mountain, rather than lend a hand to consumers in greater need. You’d rather sink retail stores, and make gamers pay a premium on all titles they buy, and force parents to work harder to afford the games their kids want for their birthdays or Christmas, just so you can theoretically see profits grow without any creative effort on your part. Also, even just selling this technology to developers for their optional use as you’re rumored to do, doesn’t make this any better than peddling drugs rather than using them.

Maybe this whole idea is just a bluff, but let me tell you something most people know. Puffing up your chest to look bigger, doesn’t really make you bigger.

But hey, I don’t want this to be a fight between us Sony. I just want you to know, that I know, that you would never actually do something so monumentally stupid as attempting to ban the sale of used games. I know that, because should you go through with it, there won’t even be the need for a fight, because in every respect in which success in this industry is measured,  you will have lost right out of the gate.

How do I know that? Well, far be it for me to brag, but it is just common sense.

Games to Avoid During a Hangover

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

*shhhh!!*

Oh, right…sorry. I almost forgot most of you are probably dying of hangovers today after the biggest drinking night of the year. Hopefully, you’ve managed to secure the day off to rest and recover, and maybe you’re even taking the time to catch up on some video games.

If so, that’s a great choice. However, not all video games are created equally, and some were most certainly not designed with a hangover in mind. That being the case, if you’re truly looking to recover from your misery, I would suggest avoiding the following games, in the way you couldn’t avoid that last shot of tequila.

Hotline Miami

I haven’t had much of a chance to talk about “Hotline Miami”, but it is one of the true hidden gems of 2012. It’s a no holds bar killing spree, that provides  a variety of tools of death for the player, and set them loose in an ultra stylish retro Miami to cause unchecked havoc while wearing a variety of power inducing masks. It’s flashy, intense, and full of the best kind of mayhem.

In other words, it’s exactly the type of game you should avoid today. Besides all of the flashing lights irritating your headache, you’ve also got to deal with a pretty serious challenge level that can frustrate you even in times of saintly levels of previous alcohol consumption. But by far the biggest reason you should stay away from “Hotline Miami” is the out of your mind storyline. “Hotline Miami” is designed to play with your sanity, and is not the kind of thing you want to wrap your head around when it’s busy swimming in a sea of jackhammers.

Definitely play “Hotline Miami”, just not today.

Fez

I’ll sing the praises of “Fez” to anyone who will listen. Not only does it carefully and casually re-invent the most classic of genres (the 2D platformer), it does it while still producing a very entertaining game. It’s one of the best of the year, and possibly beyond.

Avoid it like the plague with a hangover though. Fez’s multi-dimensional worlds require you to put some serious thought into the layout, and makes every movement, and decision a puzzle in its own right. Considering you might be having trouble getting your head around making a properly laid out sandwich at the moment, you probably don’t want to tackle such a mind, and level, bending journey today.

FTL

Much like “Hotline Miami”, I haven’t had much of a chance to talk about “FTL” yet, and hate to only do so here when telling you to avoid it.

However, as brilliant as “FTL’s” spaceship simulation gameplay is, it also requires a series of life and death micromanagement decisions. In its most intense moments, it’s like playing several games of chess at once, and can be unbelievably frustrating as you hopelessly try to salvage what remains of your mission around every turn. Considering you may currently be trying to re-build every aspect of your own life after a night of personal destruction, I wouldn’t try to take on intergalactic problems as well.

Borderlands 2

Everybody has hangover cures, but truthfully the best way to go is some vitamins, some liquids, maybe a couple of aspirin, and of course plenty of rest.

You’ll get none of this with “Borderlands 2”.It’s a game that begs you to devote hours and hours into exploring its unique and incredibly deep world filled with jokes, style, and weapons galore. Playing “Borderlands 2” is signing yourself up for another long night filled with misguided debauchery, and will only serve to making tomorrow just as miserable as today. It’s siren song is irresistible, so go nowhere near this time consuming temptress.

Spec Ops: The Line

In general, you should avoid shooters on a day of a hangover. They’re loud, big, intense, and don’t offer the kind of serene environment of recovery you could so desperately use right now.

A special mention must go to avoiding “Spec Ops” with a hangover though, as it’s storyline forces you to really face the atrocities of war head on as you dive into a plot that will see you, and everyone around you, grow in impactful ways as the horrors of the modern world re-shape them. Since you’re probably wrestling with some moral conundrums of your own after last night, you should probably not shoulder these burdens as well.

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